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Surrendering is Not Failure

The Archangels Explain

There is an abundance of pride in my family, and I’m no exception.  Pride is a funny thing.  It can be a good thing sometimes.  There have been times when pride has been the only thing that kept me going, but there have also been times that it has made me foolish, and I’ve done things or I didn’t want to do in its name.


I was raised to be strong, independent, and to stand on my own two feet.  It’s very difficult for me to ask for help sometimes, and it shouldn’t be.  Everyone needs help sometimes, and I’m happy to give it in many cases, so it shouldn’t be so hard to ask for it at times.  I learned that lesson, along with humility, when I was taking care of my husband while he was sick with Parkinson’s.  There came a point when I just couldn’t cover all the bases by myself plus work full time, take him to appointments, etc.  His medical bills were huge, and I had to work multiple jobs.  His family was great and were a big help.  They were happy to help, and I think it was good for all of us.


Sometimes, we need to know when to raise the white flag, when we’ve gotten in over our heads, before we sink all the way to the bottom.  Everyone has their limit, and everyone has their share of weaknesses and their strengths.  The Archangels share some of their wisdom and guidance regarding surrendering below.


Question:  I would like to write about when surrendering to things in life is a good thing, and getting out of our own way in order to make progress, whether that means staying the course or taking another direction entirely, is in our best interests.  Please help.




This is such an important lesson, and you have grown so much as you continue to learn it.  Surrendering has such a negative connotation for so many people.  They liken it to weakness and to losing a battle or being bested by someone or something else.  One might think this view of surrendering is tied to war and battle, as in waving the white flag, but it is also tied to the value, focus, and attention given to competition right now on Earth.


Just as labels and hierarchy are prevalent in today’s society, so is ranking everything from worst to best, least to greatest, most valued to least valued.  Everyone wants to be ranked number one, the best, the greatest.  Everyone wants to be ranked and considered to be at the very top.  This desire is exaggerated and unattainable in most cases, at least for any length of time.


Being number one is very limiting.  When someone believes they are or have been ranked number one in something, it is always temporary, and the ranking could never include all possible qualifiers.  There will always be someone “better” and someone “worse” in whatever category is ranked.  More importantly, when someone is at the very top of a particular ranking, they are often blinded to their other gifts and often do not use them.


Our channel has shared with you in the past that she was labeled “the pretty one” during her youth.  Not only did this title suggest that beauty was her greatest gift, but beauty is labeled according to personal opinion, not factual information.  Unlike many in a similar position, she did not feel the need to compete with others or view them as competition.  That way leads to a lack in self-esteem and connecting value to something that cannot last.


Although she always knew she had more to offer than her beauty, others tended to be blinded to any other gifts she possessed.  Many underestimated, resented, and misjudged her.  So many who are considered the best at something neglect to branch out and experience other things in addition to what has glorified them, because being number one feels powerful and good.  Sadly, when they fall from the pedestal, many lose their sense of self and value.


So, surrendering has a very negative connotation, and people often refuse to surrender, even when surrendering is in their best interests and is their best option.  Now we will speak to when this is the case.


We wish first to discuss obstacles to surrender.  Pride, stubbornness, entitlement, lack of self-confidence, self-knowledge, or self-acceptance, and the need for approval from others can all hinder someone when it comes to surrendering for their own good.  These things are all common in the 3D mindset, but they are beginning to lessen their control over others, thankfully.  People who refuse to admit defeat are often slaves to these things and they tie their worth and value to outside factors, when in truth, worth and value are internal or at least they should be.  You must learn to believe that you are worthy and of great value simply because you are you, a being of light, a creation of God, Source, or however you relate to the One who made everything.


The idea that one should never quit or give up is not valid.  There are definitely times when you should do so.  You are not stagnant or still.  You are always changing, growing, and evolving, assuming you allow yourself to do so.  Your desires, goals, and dreams should and do change, therefore your plans and actions should change with them.  What you started out to do or become may not suit you as well in the future, in which case, you should adjust and change directions as needed.  Do you see this?  It is not a question of whether or not you are able to accomplish something. Rather, it is a question of whether or not you still and truly want to do so.


Setting goals can be a great idea, as long as you take the time and make the effort to reevaluate them often and adjust them as is necessary.  There is nothing wrong with setting out in one direction, discovering that it is not what you had envisioned, and adjusting course accordingly.  Is that not better than forcing yourself to the finish line and being miserable?


It is important to know yourself, especially when it comes to strengths, weaknesses, and limits.  Many people are not aware of these things and that leads to many problems, as does an overabundance of and devotion to competition.  When you know yourself well, you know the things you are good at and the things you are not good at, and you are at peace with these things, if you are at peace with yourself.  If someone is better at something than you are, it should not bother you, because you are aware that, while that particular thing may not be as great a gift to you as it is for another, you have many other gifts.  It should not bother you or make you feel inferior.


Know when to surrender.  We will share some examples.  When you do not feel well physically, do not fight being sick.  Take special care of yourself or seek medical attention.  Surrender to the illness until you regain your strength.  Fighting it and refusing to slow down will only prolong the illness.


The same can be said for your mental and emotional health.  If you suffer from a loss or from some kind of trauma, do not fight it, bury it, or refuse to face it.  Allow yourself to feel the emotions that come with it.  Let them move through you and acknowledge them.  Feel them, so that you might heal from them.  You cannot heal until you absorb them, feel them, and release them.


Spiritual health must also be allowed due process.  Do not mimic or follow others if their path does not work well for you.  There is no “right” or “wrong” way to grow spiritually, and you should always seek that which works best for you.  Never mind what others do or what works for them.  By all means, try different things if they appeal to you, but if they are not a good fit, move onto something else.  Focus on what works for you and be true to yourself.


Do not be stubborn or hard-headed.  These characteristics lead to tunnel and limited vision.  Experiment with different things until you discover what brings you joy and peace.  Consider, also, that things change, and you must also change.  If a source of joy and peace ceases to work for you, try something else.  Save the stubbornness for when you truly want something that is worth the struggle.  If you aim for something that brings stress and strain, make sure it is truly something you value and not something someone has convinced you to want.  The reward should balance out the suffering.


Lastly, let us speak of pride.  There is nothing wrong in taking pride in yourself and your accomplishments.  You should celebrate and feel good about your achievements.  However, keep in mind that the occasional failure as an opportunity to learn and grow, to evolve.  There should be no shame in failure or in giving up on something when it is either out of reach, or you have realized that you no longer wish to reach it. 


Consider that when you surrender or release something, whether it be a dream, a goal, a plan, a job, or a relationship, you make room for something better for you.  Go to your heart and listen to your intuition. 


Seek your dreams and formulate your plans.  Work hard to make them a reality, but reevaluate often, and do not be afraid to change directions or take a different path.  Do not try to be someone else or follow another’s path, because you wish you were more like them.  See yourself, your gifts, strengths, and weaknesses clearly, and always, always be true to yourself.


We send you all Love and Light.


Final Thoughts


I think we need to remember what the Angels said about failure not being attached to shame.  We’re not always going to succeed, and that’s a good thing, so we can learn how to deal with adversity and handle failure without it defeating us. It’s one thing to have a strong work ethic and take pride in what you do, always doing your best, but it’s quite another to lose faith in yourself and feel inferior to others simply because they’re better at something than you are.  While we are all good and not so good at some things, we are all equally valuable and worthy. 


When I see someone who is better at something than I am, I usually try to seek them out and ask them for advice and pointers.  I don’t view them as the enemy or competition.  I want to learn what I can from them and offer to help them with whatever they need help with that I can provide.  Rather than competition, I’d rather view others as people I can cooperate and possible collaborate with, so we can help each other.


Some competition is fine, as long as it’s friendly and our self-worth isn’t tied to the outcome.  Admiring someone is fine, as long as that admiration doesn’t lead to viewing them as competition.  We can’t win all the time, and we need to know ourselves well enough to know when surrender is our best option.  It’s the best option when holding on leads to misery and unhappiness, especially is they are long lasting, and threaten our joy and peace.  What is worth that?  I can’t think of a thing.  Surrender isn’t necessarily losing at something.  Sometimes it’s simply doing what’s best for us. 


Blessings, all.


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