Releasing Anger

The Archangels Tell Us How

Last week, I went to close the sale of my current home, and I was very excited.  Unfortunately, I received a message from a friend of my late husband who worked at the title company that dampened my enthusiasm.  He delivered a message from another friend of my husband’s that was way out of line, telling me to send a guitar that had belonged to my husband to his sick stepson who suffers from MS.  The man who sent me this message blamed me for my husband’s death, as I’d refused to have him committed to a full-time care facility, where he believed they could make him do his exercises and eat right, etc.  That’s not what my husband wanted, and I did not take the legal steps to make it happen.

Without getting into too much detail about something that happened over a decade ago, suffice it to say that a year after my husband’s death, I ended up pressing charges against this person for harassment after a year of putting up with letters and balloons addressed to my dead husband that he placed on my car (after dark), constantly seeing him parked down the block from my house, watching for who knows what, and receiving many messages blaming me for his death at a time when I was myself grieving. His accusations and antics were not only harassment, but they were untrue and unfair, and after promising the detective who was assigned to the case that he wouldn’t bother me anymore, he broke that promise and ended up being arrested, and placed under a protective order. This all happened over a decade ago, and I thought it was over and done.

You’d think he’d have learned better, but no.  Anyway, it stirred the angry memories, and it took me a couple of days to find my calm again.  I’m sorry to say I have yet to find compassion for the man, so I’ll have to settle for not wishing him any harm.  I’m still toying with the idea of hiring a lawyer to inform him that I’ll take more action against him if he ever contacts me again, in person, on the phone, via email, or through a third party.  From the get-go of the occurrence, I focused on releasing the anger, and I was able to do that, but it took a while.  I’d like to think I’m above anger, but the truth is, like most everyone, sometimes my buttons get pushed, and I have to go back to basics to return to my habitual peaceful mind’s setting.

There’s a lot of anger in the world right now.  I know people who are still furious with the presidential election results, and others continue to build and feed their anger as the policies they object to continue to be revealed.  The thing is, though, being angry doesn’t hurt the person or people or situation you’re angry with, it hurts the person who carries the anger.  I asked the Archangels for some guidance on how we can best deal with the anger we carry, and their answer follows.

Question:  I would like to write about the futility of holding onto anger.  Please help.

Answer: 

Of course.  We like how you worded the question.  It is not anger itself that is futile, it is indulging it and clinging to it that is disruptive and if held too long, destructive, mostly to the one who holds it. 

Part of the human experience is feeling and hopefully learning to manage human emotions, assuming that is part of the life plan in place.  In nearly all cases, to be human is to be emotional.  The trick to managing emotions is to learn to choose a rational response to them, rather than to relinquish control and react without thinking. 

As is obvious, while some emotions are pleasant, others are not.  It is important to allow yourself to experience them all as they come to you, for you cannot process and release them without first acknowledging and experiencing them.  However, experiencing them does not mean you have to be or remain at their mercy.

Anger is not a pleasant emotion to experience, but it can serve a purpose.  Anger can lead to positive action being taken to correct something that needs to change.  It is important, however, to add logic and temperance when dealing with anger, so you can focus on the issue that led to the anger in an effective manner.  Anger can cloud judgment if you allow it to do so, and actions fueled by emotion alone are rarely wise and often regretted due to being caught in the “heat of the moment.”

Equally important is the damage anger can do to the Big 4, joy, hope, love, and peace.  Anger excludes these things in almost all cases.  As our channel has said in the past, anger does not feel good, and when you entertain it and cling to it, it takes a great toll on you.  Yes, in many cases, you are entitled to your anger, so embrace it, but then you must remember to process it and release it, so you can return to joy and peace of mind.  Your anger is not dependent on the situation or the people involved.  It is dependent on you and how you choose to process it.  Will you feed it, keeping it alive, or will you starve it and dismiss its effects?  It is always your choice. 

To choose to release anger requires conscious effort that can begin with something as simple as saying to yourself, “I do not want to feel this way anymore.”  Then, switch your focus from replaying the event or person’s actions that angered you to concentrating on something that brings you joy, hope, love, and/or peace.  Work on the Big 4 until it overpowers your anger.  When it tries to take over again, shut it down and repeat to yourself that you are done feeling that way, until your anger fades to memory. 

This is not to say that you will forget it or the memory entirely or that it will not be triggered again, but you will be in control of it, rather than it controlling you.  Remove yourself from triggers when you can, but when you cannot, you can still be in charge. 

There are those who nurse and feed their anger, because they feel so justified in feeling it.  Our guidance is not to suggest that you are not justified in feeling as you do.  There are many times a situation or a person deserves your anger, but feeling anger towards someone or something does not harm them.  On the contrary, it often empowers them, and it certainly gives them power over you.  No, our guidance is meant to help you recover and dismiss the anger you carry, along with its sources, because that is what is best for you in terms of energetic balance and vibration, consciousness, and of course, the Big 4.  It is far better for you on all levels, physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, and energetic, to choose to release your anger and instead spend your time and effort pursuing healthier things.

Lastly, we would suggest that you consider using compassion as a defense against anger.  Sometimes, people purposely try to anger others, and sometimes that is not the intention, and intent should always be a consideration.  Either way, though, there is often fear, ignorance, manipulation, and/or lack of clarity behind conflicts between people.  This is certainly true in today’s politically charged setting.  It is better to stay away from closed-minded people with opposing viewpoints.  If a willingness to listen and understand another viewpoint is not present, any discussion, whether it escalates into anger or not, is futile and serves no good purpose.  Avoid such confrontations.

The cure for anger is setting the intention to release it and replacing it through focus and conscious effort with other emotions such as the Big 4 that feel better and do not compromise your choices and actions.  It is not always easy, much less automatic, to do this, but it is entirely possible and better for you in so many ways.  Emotions and the actions they can provoke are habits you can choose to indulge or reject.  Try to indulge the Big 4 instead and reject emotions such as anger and fear.  You will not only feel better, but you will be able to see things more clearly and take controlled actions rather than reacting without thought.

We send you all healing energies of Love and Light.

Final Thoughts

I’m back in my happy place again.  I assume the “friend” who passed on the message to me was manipulated and told how much it would mean to the dying stepson of his deceased friend to receive something that had meant so much to his stepdad at one time, a man he loved and admired.  The stepson has never asked me for anything. We were very close at one time, and I’m very sorry his health is failing. I don’t think there was any malice on the part of the messenger, and I can find compassion for him, if not for the other guy.  I even went on to explain to him that I had already given most of my late husband’s guitars to his granddaughter, because I thought that was what my husband would want. 

I may still send a cease and desist letter via a lawyer, not out of anger so much as avoidance for something like this ever happening again.  I got through it, and overcame the anger, but I’d rather not have to go through the steps again, if I can help it.  I’ll think about it (logically, rather than emotionally). 

Anyway, tonight marks another round of meditation with the Archangels, and the intention for the month of April is Courage for ourselves, for each other, and for everyone in the world.  If you’d like to join us, choose a time and a place that suits you, and call on the Archangels to join their energy with yours and disperse it where it most needs to go.  This is a simple, private, easy way to get involved with making the world a better place a small step at a time. 

Happy Friday, everybody.  I hope you have a wonderful, anger-free weekend full of the Big 4.

Blessings, all.